Friends, it’s a common sentiment these days to say, “Destroy anyone who plays with your feelings” or “Teach them a lesson.” Feelings can be manipulated by anyone—whether a boy or a girl. Breaking promises in love or revealing the truth much later is undoubtedly a form of betrayal.

Let’s explore this thought through a story:

Surabhi and Hitesh’s friendship had blossomed into love during college, almost without their realizing it. Their relationship had been going strong for three years. However, in the past three to four months, their bond had been strained by frequent fights. Disagreements were not new to them, but this time, things felt different. The arguments were persistent, and for the past month, they had stopped talking altogether. Both were troubled, but the issue seemed too complicated to resolve through conversation alone.

Surabhi had only one close friend, Anu, who had known about their relationship since college. When Surabhi felt completely helpless, she confided in Anu. After listening, Anu said, “Sometimes the solution is right in front of us, but we fail to see it, and instead, we focus on things that don’t even exist. Don’t worry. Tomorrow, we’ll visit Ramu Kaka. He’ll make everything clear.” The next evening, the two went to meet Ramu Kaka at his home.

Surabhi narrated her entire story without holding back. After listening, Kaka smiled briefly before speaking in a serious tone, “My dear, you feel that Hitesh is betraying you. If that were true, why would he share everything with you? When he openly discussed his thoughts, behavior, and habits, you didn’t object then. But now, you’re using those same things to criticize and doubt him. That’s not fair. If he intended to deceive you, he wouldn’t have been so transparent about himself.

“Of course, you might argue that he didn’t willingly share these things, but that you coaxed them out of him. Am I right?” Kaka asked, looking at Surabhi. She nodded hesitantly, and Kaka continued, “When he was job-hunting and grieving his father’s death, you supported him and his family emotionally and financially. And when he found a job, he repaid all the money. Later, when you were struggling with family conflicts and office politics, he stood by you, tolerating your anger and frustration with a smile.

“Now that things are stable, he says he wants a better job and a new home before marrying you, and you think he’s betraying you just because you’ve seen him with other girls a few times?”

Surprised, Surabhi interrupted, “Kaka, how did you know this? I didn’t tell you!”

Kaka chuckled, “Didn’t Anu tell you that I know everything? Just kidding. I can read faces and understand the heart’s turmoil—it doesn’t matter if you tell me or not. Anyway, my dear, a flying bird should never be caged. The love between a couple is like a bird soaring through the skies, capable of reaching any height. Trying to control love is like locking that bird in a cage. Now you must decide: do you want a lover or a trained pet? A partner or a captive bird?

“Based on what you’ve told me, I don’t believe he’s a cheat. However, humans are prone to momentary lapses—it’s human nature. In such situations, it’s the partner’s responsibility to guide them back. Negativity only breeds more negativity. If you think he’s straying, it means he’s trapped in negativity. By doubting him, you’re only feeding that negativity. Instead, nurture love, increase positivity, and create a magnetic pull within yourself that overcomes his negativity.

“From my experience, what you’re thinking is unlikely true. But if you wish to continue the relationship, follow my advice. As for your question about teaching him a lesson if he’s truly betraying you—that would only apply to shallow relationships or ones where you don’t know the person or their family well. If his entire relationship with you were based on lies, then yes, you’d be right to cut ties and even teach him a lesson.

“But you’ve known Hitesh and his family for five years. Thinking this way about him is unfair. That’s not to say the world isn’t filled with deceitful, masked people—they definitely deserve to be taught a lesson. That’s why I always advise everyone to let romantic relationships mature for at least four to five years before committing, and to keep their eyes and ears open. In love, follow your heart, but sometimes, listen to your mind too.”

Surabhi stood up, touched Kaka’s feet, and said, “Thank you, Kaka. I understand now. I’ll take my leave.” Smiling, she walked out with Anu, her heart lighter and her doubts cleared.